February 17, 2009

• God has a plan and a purpose for everything, right?

  If I truly believe that, I have to consider why this whole thing with my parents happened in the first place.

   

  I went to Atlanta the other day to have dinner with my aunt and uncle and baby cousin (she turns six months old tomorrow!) for my birthday, and my uncle and I got to talking about my dad.

  My father barely knows my cousin exists, doesn't have any desire to meet her or get to know her, and told my uncle, in the following precise words, that he should just "forget [he] ever existed."

  My uncle's argument was that, "He's my brother.  That won't change.  I can't forget him, and I won't."

  And we got to talking about it.  My aunt and uncle are crazy about each other; that much is obvious.  And the deal with my father, according to my uncle, has enlightened him to the fact that he needs to put his wife and kids first, now and forever.  He needs never to take Meg for granted, not to let himself drift away from her.  He needs to work to maintain their relationship.  My uncle is a very successful, very driven and devoted band director.  He loves his job, and he hates being sick because he absolutely cannot stand being away from it.

  But he realizes that his first priority needs to be the people waiting for him when he comes home in the evening, exhausted and often frustrated.  He's not going to let history repeat itself.

  The joy he derives from being around his young daughter is blatantly obvious when you see him interact with her.  And I know that my father used to be the same way with me.  Sometimes I am amazed how wholly and completely a person can change.

  Thank the good Lord that my uncle and so many others have had this opportunity to learn from my father's mistakes.

   

  May I always remember the greatest thing my father ever taught me:  that the last thing I want to be, is him.

   

  

  • 3:33 pm
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